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If you are not up to date on GW News or do not understand a headline, the link before each piece should help fill you in.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Issue 4: November 5th

Original Article
Administrators Shocked To Learn GW Not A Country
Pentagon Spurred To Warn School Of Perils Of Secession By News Of Knapp's Wife

GW Has Been On "Watch List" Alongside Alaska And Texas Since Vishal Scandal






Original Article
Students Pretending To Be Politicos React To Elections Pretending To Matter
Student Newspaper Pretending To Be Lucid Leads With Story

"Look, Country, look! We're Being Political! You're Not LOOKING!"




Original Article
FoBoGro Receives "License To Dill"
Refurbished Deli To Be Stocked With Quantum of Salads, The Rye Who Loved Me

Try Their Moonbaker, It's Perfect On Her Majesty's Secret Sauce







Original Article
Selfish Professors Refuse To Resign
University Could Be Enjoying This Weak Job Market, But Noooo
People Seem To Enjoy The Security Employment Brings, To GW's Chagrin






Original Article
Due To Sheer Awesomeness, GW Near Capacity
Foggy Bottom Can't Handle Our Shit, Says Spokesman
City-Imposed Limits Can "Suck" It

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